How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
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