im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Randomize