I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
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