no. you can't hotbox the world.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize
