I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
Randomize
