At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
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