dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
