I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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