just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Randomize
