just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
Everything about him screamed your future.
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Randomize
