i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
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