dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
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