Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
That was an excessively violent trivia night
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
Randomize
