Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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