Your dad touched me again.
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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