Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Randomize
