just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Randomize
