I can tuck mytits in my pants
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
meet me or not, i'm out of control
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
Randomize
