Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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