The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
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