So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
Randomize
