You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
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