But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize
