what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
