i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
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