we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
Randomize
