i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Randomize