Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
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