dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
