who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist...
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
