he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
Randomize
