If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
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