i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
Randomize