What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
That was an excessively violent trivia night
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
Im part way to drunk.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
And then he peed in my hair
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