one word: firstdatebathroomanal
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
Randomize