Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
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