No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
Randomize
