Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
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