dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
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