i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
He did a backflip because drugs
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
Randomize