it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
