she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
