Just mADE A PArabola og urine
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Randomize
