Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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