this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
Randomize
