Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
