So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
Turn sideways at McDonald's = actual directions to a winery
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
Randomize
