you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
