OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
Every concussion has its silver lining
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
I drank a fishbowl of liquor and next thing I know I'm sliding into Zach Galifinakis' DMs
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
