omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
Randomize
