It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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