My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
Randomize
